My Six Favourite Literary Insults
It’s not all elegant sentences and good taste in the literary world…sometimes words can wound and sometimes they can bite back…
Mark Twain on Jane Austen
I haven’t any right to criticize books, and I don’t do it except when I hate them. I often want to criticize Jane Austen, but her books madden me so that I can’t conceal my frenzy from the reader; and therefore I have to stop every time I begin. Every time I read ‘Pride and Prejudice,’ I want to dig her up and hit her over the skull with her own shin-bone.
William Faulkner on Mark Twain
A hack writer who would not have been considered fourth rate in Europe, who tricked out a few of the old proven sure fire literary skeletons with sufficient local color to intrigue the superficial and the lazy.
William Faulkner on Ernest Hemingway
He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary.
Ernest Hemingway on William Faulkner
Poor Faulkner. Does he really think big emotions come from big words?
And my favourite from more recent times.
Terry Eagleton, Professor of Cultural theory at the National University of Ireland was highly critical of the poet Craig Raine‘s first novel, Heartbreak.
…the publishers have represented it as a novel, rather as Jedward are represented as singers…The description is true but misleading…
Raine is most famous for his 1970s poem A Martian Sends A Postcard Home (which I often use in creative writing classes). His response to the damning review?
I really enjoyed not reading Terry Eagleton’s review almost as much as he enjoyed not reading my novel
Think the Eagleton/Raine match was a score draw…
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21 comments on “My Six Favourite Literary Insults”
Leave a Reply to bridget whelan Cancel reply
BACK TO CREATIVE WRITING SCHOOL — 120+ reviews on Amazon and over 75% gave it five stars
A Good Confession
"Unputdownable" Miriam Stoppard
BRIDGET WHELAN writer 
Reblogged this on Chris The Story Reading Ape's Blog….. An Author Promotions Enterprise!.
Thanks for the reblog – had a tweet from someone who said Eagleton can’t have read Raine’s novel or listened to Jedward. I thought she was joking until I realised she described herself as the lads’ number one fan.
LOLOLOL – there’s always ONE isn’t there Bridget! 😀
Reblogged this on Have We Had Help? and commented:
It’s not just trolls that spew contemptable criticism. 🙂
I heard Gore Vidal give a talk a few years before he died where he said he no longer criticised living authors, the dead could take it but leave the living in peace. I think he was mellowing with age – or been in too many scraps – but I think he had a point. Having said that, it’s hard not to wince at Twain’s comments about Jane…
I’d like to hit Mark Twain with his own shin bone for that! 🙂
I’ve been reading more of his comments: there is an unpublished essay where Twain imagines entering Austen’s world like a barkeeper, dismissive of everything he sees, but inside is ashamed that he can’t appreciate something whch is clearly fine and well crafted. I think he recognised the society she descrtibed and the characters she brought to life and hated her for describing it so well that it got under his skin. I feel much the same about modern jazz….
I can live without the modern jazz, but style envy… yup, that I understand. 🙂
My, my, Bridget – these big authors also have big egos. Imagine that. This post was an eye-opener and actually quite fun!
Glad you enjoyed it.
Big egos and much posturing. Tsk. Tsk. Great post.
Great quotes! It’s fun to see these famous others getting all sniffy about each other! Entertaining post!
Sniffy is the right word – although I think that Hemingway probably made the best point.
I quite liked ‘I greatly enjoyed NOT reading his review, as he greatly enjoyed NOT reading my book’…’nuff said!
Feel that one might come in useful sometime…!
Reblogged this on cornfedcontessa and commented:
Interesting read.
Thanks for reblogging.
Thanks, Bridget. Now none of us need feel bad about our writing. 🙂
I suppose puts our own bad reviews into some kind of context – I wouldn’t want to be on the wrong side of these tongues. Beware a witty critic who can write…
What I love about these is how well they are written. Nothing like the review trolls on Amazon! 😀
I think my favorite insult ever is Winston Churchill’s ‘Never engage in a battle of wits with an unarmed man.’ I’m don’t know whether he was leveling this at anyone in particular but I’m definitely saving it up for one of those days when it’s raining idiots. The only problem with this one would be the recipient of said insult wouldn’t understand it; unlike yours above!
Thank you for sharing the Winston Churchill quote – I haven’t heard it before. One to be saved for the right time!