Mrs Finnegan’s Almanac Reveals THREE of Life’s Great Truths

Mrs Finnegan’s Maxim for Getting Ahead

Flatter someone behind their back (to folk you are certain will not only repeat what you say but also remember to mention your name).

The Magic of May Dew

I realise that I am a day late telling you this, but the revitalising power of dew collected before dawn on May Day cannot be exaggerated.

There is NOTHING better for the skin. It can heal wounds, vanish spots and blemishes and wipe away worry lines. All you have to do is wash with it.

The morning moisture throughout the whole of May is most desirable but nothing matches dew collected on May Day morning. Still, you’ll know for next year.

Saint of the Week

St Trudpert Feast Day April 26

I might have left him out as his feast day has also come and gone but two things stopped me.

One was his name. Say it aloud. It’s quite delicious.

The second reason is the manner of his death which was some time in the 7th century in the Black Forest. He was a missionary and a local nobleman gave him land to a build a church on and some serfs to look after him. Some time later Trudpert was murdered under a pine tree by one of the serfs because he was such a severe master.

We must presume that he also had some wonderful character traits and I would like to think that now, regretting his past behaviour, he would want to be the patron saint of misused and abused servants everywhere. Having April 26th as an annual servants holiday would be a nice touch. I shall speak to someone about it as soon as I fix apon the right person.

News That Might Have Escaped You

This day three years ago (to be clear, May 2nd 1833) it was reported that William Worsley of Stanley Street, Liverpool had died leaving a VAST fortune of £15,000 to his only surviving sister.

It was discovered that for many years past she had been an inmate of the Manchester Workhouse. I wonder what she is doing now.

I do hope she is sitting in well-appointed parlour in a Spitafields silk dress, sipping tea and writing letters of complaint to the Board of Guardians.

Readers’ Recipe Choice

I asked what you would prefer – a cooking recipe or a cleaning one and you replied in your DOZENS. I am grateful for each and every one of your letters but you left me with a dilemma.

About half were very anxious to have something NEW to prepare in the kitchen.
About half were more concerned with keeping the household in a state of wholesome cleanliness.

After considerable reflection, I have come up with the PERFECT compromise.

After all that work and good white wine, you will want to make sure that no DROP is wasted.

Katchup or Catsup (or however you spell it in your locality) is a champion cleaner of brass and copper. So, scrutinise the plates carefully after dinner, pick off fish bones & other unregarded morsels and scrape every trace of the pungent sauce into a jar you have ready for the purpose. Use it to burnish your copper saucepan and brass candlesticks.

I can also reveal the finest brass cleaning TOOL that any housekeeper could wish for.

YES!
Your fingers!
The venerable Mistress Burton (who taught me everything I know about housework) showed me when I was but a chit of a girl that cleaning rags and fancy cloths could NEVER match the power of diligent finger work. Try it for yourself – with katchup – and you shall see the truth of it.

I can add from MY OWN experience what you should do DIRECTLY after you have given brass and copper a thorough cleaning.

Clean it again.

It is one of the three great truths of life best learnt young:

• It always rains on your afternoon off
• one size does not fit all
• brass and copper always needs cleaning

And finally…

The more astute of my many readers will have noticed that there was no Almanac episode last week. This was for technical reasons that I am at a loss to explain. Let us skim over it with the grace of a dragon fly alighting upon a lily pad.

However, circumstances have forced me to adopt a NEW timetable that results in my almanac appearing twice per month instead of weekly.

Why? you ask and really the answer is very simple.

I had not been prepared for marriage TAKING up quite so much TIME and being quite so much hard WORK.

Wives have kept this a secret from their single sisters for too long.

I therefore want to send a message to women contemplating sharing their lives with their one true love. MarriAGE adds years to you and there’s a reason why it has an alternative name – wedLOCK.

It is, of course. for most brides a price worth paying and I should add – in case there’s any doubt – that Master Peregrine and I are deliriously happy.

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