Mrs Finnegan Needs YOU and You and You

And sadly, so does Mr Cubbage.

You may have got the impression that a well-regarded and SUPERIOR establishment such as The Regency Town House would employ a steady body of servants with few changes from one year’s end to the next.

Not so.

While senior members of staff, such as myself, may stay put having PROVED our worth, maids come and go. Some return home to work in the fields, some find alternative employment in factories and HOTELS, while others marry. The most promising seek advancement, dreaming that the next step will take them closer to becoming a HOUSEKEEPER and there is nothing wrong with that. But it does mean I am now rather short of kitchen maids, kitchen skivvies and parlour maids.

I happened to mention it to Mr Cubbage and he insisted that he too needed extra help. Personally, I feel a butler is ALREADY an unnecessary extravagance and I wonder if we really require a footman whose chief skill is to keep awake while waiting to be told what to do. (AND not all of them can manage that.) But I shall not comment, as the male staff is his domain and I am not one to INTERFERE.

So, we are seeking new members of our happy family of domestic servants.

You are therefore INVITED to a special Sunday afternoon at The Regency Town House when you will be given a TOUR of upstairs as well as downstairs, and discover how much you could earn, how OFTEN you are expected to wash, and how early you have to get up.

You will be instructed on what to do if you should meet the master or mistress on the stairs and be shown where servants eat and sleep.

Find out too why the postman ALWAYS rings twice and why you should never quarrel with a night soil man.

Sadly, it is unlikely that any of you will meet the discerning standards of The Regency Town House, but everyone will be treated to a delicious afternoon tea in the kitchen.

You will also be presented with your own copy of Mrs Finnegan’s Guide to Love, Life & Laxatives (usually £9.99). Already got a copy? It will make the PERFECT Christmas gift for a discerning friend.

The day is Sunday November 15 and the time 2 O’ Clock.
The place is 13 Brunswick Square, just to the east of Hove village, and west of Brighton’s town centre.
The cost is £20 plus Eventbrite’s booking fee.

Click here to book YOUR place: Minimum wage? You must be joking! Tickets, Sunday, November 15  •  2 PM – 4 PM | Eventbrite